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Not having those newfangled contraptions in my own home (this electrification frenzy will pass none too soon for me!), I am quite ignorant of such esoterica."Should he lift her gown and attempt to caress her thereunder, the bride must pull the covering quickly back in place, extricated herself from his clutches, and give him to understand that she must immediately attend to a call of nature."I am tempted to laughter. Imagine a reader perusing her article 100 years hence. He might well think it falsified, if not meanwhile overcome by disgust at the sheer and utter hypocrisy expressed within.Yours as ever, AbbyOctober 9, 1894Dear Abby,Had it not been for my own grandmother, born to the enlightened Eastchester Eastheimers in a more forgiving century than ours, I myself might well have been hoodwinked by such invidious trumpery. Prior to my wedding day, dear old Grannie Ruth (after whom we were to name our ill-starred progeny) took me under her wing and instructed me in all those matters. Each year since our ninth birthday we both picked Dallas. This year I was running a little late. I had just gotten out of the shower and unlike other girls I let my hair dry itself. I had always found it a waist of time. It was around 80 degrees so I decided I would wear a white tank top and short green shorts. I had wore this outfit before around the boys so I figured it would be nice for today. I had quickly pulled my hair back into a long ponytail, grabbed Trevor’s birthday present, and ran across the street to where Trevor and Dallas was.“Hay everyone I’m here!!” I screamed as I walked into Trevor’s house. Dallas was the first in the hall to come see me. But when he stepped out in the hallway he stopped dead in his tracks. His mouth hung open just a little as he looked at me. I felt a little uncomfortable because Dallas had never ever once looked at me like he was then. It was only a few seconds later that Trevor was right next to him with the same face expression.Now I felt.
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